Valentine's Day

It's over...just like that. The minute February hits, I dread the infamous Hallmark holiday that goes right up on my list with New Years Eve. It's funny, people (usually couples) love to say how much they hate the holiday - so much so - that this year, I think I believed them. I try to tell myself, it's just another day.

One year, one of my sister's, whose fiance was living in another state - too far to travel to - was alone on Valentine's Day. She didn't mind hanging with her single sister and had no woe's about the day, because even though her guy wasn't with her -she had a guy. I had the single blues, so in this instance, we reached out to Applebees, their chicken finger basket with the delicious honey mustard can cure just about anything. So, we get in the car and decide to curbside to go it (let's face it, it was still Valentine's Day - we were not going in for take out - even at Applebees). I looked out the rear view mirror, the waiter was approaching, and he was dressed in a Cupid costume...delivering our chicken finger baskets. I hated Valentine's Day that year - more than ever. A waiter...dressed as Cupid...I mean...really.

This Valentine's weekend was spent with family and friends. My cute nephews were happy to be my Valentines. Well, when I asked one nephew if he would be my Valentine - he would say NO! (I know he really meant yes). The priest at church even corrected a prayer that was to pray for everyone celebrating Valentine's Day...married and engaged. So he said - what about the single people?? Props to Father :) Anyway, looking back if Valentine's Day is about love...then there was lots of it this weekend...single and all.

The Repeat

A few months ago, on Facebook, I received a friend request from a guy, who looked vaguely familiar, but after looking at his tiny postage stamp picture, I decided I didn't know him. His status said he was single and he looked somewhat attractive, but I like to separate my Facebook from my online dating, so I hit ignore - goodbye to him.

On another note, while looking through my online dating site, I came across a guy, good looking enough, and decided I'll go back later and maybe email him. For some reason, I don't like to make the first move on the online dating sites, instead I prefer to stare at their pictures until my retina's burn or until these guys morph into Brad Pitt look alike's, which doesn't quite seem to happen.

Back to Facebook - hope you can follow! Bored one day, I decide to use the feature where Facebook allows you to go through your email contacts and see if any of your contacts are on Facebook, so you can add them. Well, sure enough Facebook told me that the guy that tried to add me a few months ago was an email contact of mine?! That meant I knew him?! We've emailed?! Luckily, with gmail, I can search old emails from forever ago to see what was written. Of course, I learn we emailed a few times referring to how we met online! I then realize he is the guy that I put aside and was going to email from the online site. He was a repeat!!!

I found by reading our emails that after a few, I stopped emailing him. Could it have been that I went on one of my bad online dating dates and took it out on him? I just couldn't remember! So...I emailed him on Facebook. I apologized for not accepting his friend request months ago and explained that my memory had failed me. I said I realized that we had met online and that I stopped emailing, but wasn't sure why - maybe he can refresh my memory. Also in my crazy head, if he came back into my life - it would have to be fate...yeah right.

He instantly wrote back and added me as his friend on Facebook. Well, now it was time to dive into all the pics. I started to panic, some were ok, some not. I started to realize that maybe this was why I stopped emailing him - I found that I might not be attracted to him...was that what happened last time? One of the pics he's wearing a gold chain...I'm sorry - just not a fan! Now I've drummed it all up again? Certainly, I can't stop emailing the guy AGAIN...for the second year in a row. I told myself to stop nitpicking and staring at these pictures! I'm sure the gold chain isn't cemented to his neck. Well, he asked me to go out last Saturday, but I had plans with my girls, who I would never ditch! I kindly told him we could meet some other time...we'll see...the ball is in his court...

Love is on sale!

I've been told that Rhode Island has been voted the WORST place to be single...great. It's the size of a pea, so I don't know why that surprises me. Once out with one of my friends, we ran into a girl we know and she leaned over to us and said "oh honey...if you haven't dated him I have" and I was like...thank you - that's comforting - not.

People are always suggesting things to do and how to meet guys. My favorite is the grocery store. I often wonder how strolling through the grocery store on a Sunday night, with barely a stitch of make up on and sporting the ugliest lounge wear, because I just remembered that if I don't get there before they close, then I will not be able to start my weekly Monday diet. So, add a cartful of Kashi, Weight Watchers and Lean Cuisine products and yup I'm sure the man of my dreams will be chasing me through the aisles. Still waiting for that to happen.

Next is the set up. For some reason, I always think this is the way it will happen. Someone close to me who knows me the best will set me up with Mr. Right. However, somehow all the things my close peeps know and love me for seems to escape their brains and I end up getting fixed up with someone that I would never ever go out with (this is where my shallow side may come out - it's there I admit). No less, after I go out with the "set up man" and determine, or perhaps he determines we weren't quite the match that everyone thought we would be; I have to pray I'm not disowned by the attempted matchmakers. Luckily that hasn't happened!

In the year of 2010, although attempted before, I am back trying online dating. Full force. Not giving up (which tends to happen after one bad date for me) I practically cancel the online dating service from my iPhone in the parking lot after the bad date. This time, I'm trying to approach it in a light and airy kind of way. Although, it really is a strange way to meet people. Let's face it, you're determining if you want to meet a stranger out in a public place, by looking at a picture the size of a postage stamp and reading about how adventurous he is - every guys profile these days reads: works out everyday, loves to whitewater raft and bungee jump...I mean seriously! Of course, since the most important thing in a relationship now apparently is adventure, one of the online dating profile questions I had to answer was "what is your idea of adventure?" The answer I wanted to write...ONLINE DATING!! Anyway, I keep getting emails from these matchmaking websites that say "love is on sale!" - I thought you couldn't buy love, but we'll see...

The Naming of the Blog...

I knew it was coming...the world of blogging...so intriguing, cleansing, the desire was there for months, the topic..unfortunately easily established, the only thing missing - the title. I've been divorced for 9 years, so I consider myself single, in fact, very single these days. I've finally found the "entertaining" side of this crazy single life that I try every day to embrace. Let's face it (and I say this after the intake of a very deep breath) this could be the way it is forever (release of breath). I've thought of blogging the tales of my single life for many months now...it was just the title that was holding me back! Many titles, however, had run through my mind...

First, I thought "Single and Fabulous!" - yes, taken from an episode of every single girls favorite show "Sex and the City", but then I thought - if I'm so fabulous, then why am I single?! Scratch that title. Next, maybe something like "Desperately Seeking...." STOP...probably the one reason I didn't want to do this blog is the perception (hopefully that lives only in my head) that if you're single you are desperate - NO DESPERATION HERE! My favorite title that I just couldn't quite work out was going through the acronyms "SWF" - trying to find ways for it to translate to "Why the F am I still Single????" Wait - I'm going down the angry road, which is NOT what this blog is supposed to be about (although I can't promise it won't go down that road!) How about "To All the Single Ladies!"...sounds way better coming from Beyonce, because frankly I can only think of 5 or 6 single ladies that I know - "To All the 5 or 6 Single Ladies "- just doesn't flow.

Last night, it happened. I went out with one of my favorite single girlfriends. We had great conversation as usual, covering all our favorite topics. The martini's were delicious and the food - amazing! In fact, I had just been thinking that I could eat this meal every night, I am sooo happy right now - perfectly satisfied. I put my fork down and next thing I know...my friend...holding a forkful of salad, says to me "you need to try this salad - it is the BEST salad you will ever taste." Honestly, the perfect night came to a screeching halt. SALAD AS MY LAST BITE?! The fork was a millisecond from my mouth, with no choice but to open and eat it, because really, she wouldn't take no for an answer. It turns out - I could not have been happier to make this bite of salad my last bite - it was so delicious and I'm talking equal to the meal I would've had every night delicious! I thanked her for knowing I would love it and making me try it, then she looked at me - with her wide pretty eyes and said "SEE?! I WOULD BE A GOOD GIRLFRIEND?!" I completely understood why she said that, because we have that "single girl understanding". She related the salad tasting moment to how she would treat a guy - of course, the guy too would love the salad (and her for having him try it!) The minute she said it - I knew I wanted it as the title of my blog, because you see, there are so many times I think..."I would be a good girlfriend?!"